A Year Already!

A year ago today, I received the dreaded phone call that rocked my world. I remember the moment like it was yesterday...yet it also feels like it was a lifetime ago. It was an early Friday evening and Mike and Nick weren't home yet.

I had seen the ultrasound image prior to my biopsy, and what I saw did NOT look normal, so I wasn't exactly expecting good news. But when the doctor called, it was still shocking to hear the words: "Unfortunately, it's not good news. You have breast cancer."

I asked the doctor what kind of breast cancer it was, and she told me it was infiltrating ductal carcinoma (IDC). That sounded pretty bad to me. However, I did feel some relief when she told me that it was the most common type of breast cancer. I thought to myself, "well, at least it wasn't some rare type that doctors/researchers didn't know much about."

She also told me that the cancer was grade 1 and to just keep on focusing on that bit of good news. Grading (not to be confused with staging) refers to how the cancer cells look under the microscope compared with normal breast cells. Grade 1 or low-grade cancer cells look the most similar to normal cells and grow very slowly. As it turns out, I ended up having a Grade 2 cancer with cells that look more abnormal and that are slightly faster growing. But at the time, it was comforting to have something positive to focus on.

What I remember most vividly from that evening is hanging up the phone and saying out loud to my empty house: "Holy f---! I have breast cancer!"

And here I am a year later ... feeling great and so grateful for all of the blessings in my life, especially Mike and Nicholas. I absolutely could not have gotten through the past year without them.

We celebrated Nicholas' 5th birthday in February and registered him for Kindergarten. We also received the wonderful news on his birthday that he got into the full-day program.  Crazy to think my little guy will start going to elementary school this September. Yikes!

I just finished the third week of my long-term substitute assignment in a 3rd grade classroom at Issaquah Valley Elementary. I am having an absolute ball being back teaching again and being back at IVE. It is such a wonderful school with an amazing staff and fabulous students.

I also recently attended the C4YW (Conference for Young Women) in Bellevue. What an incredible experience!!  This awesome event was put on by the national chapter of the Young Survival Coalition and attended by hundreds of young breast cancer survivors, diagnosed under the age of 45. It was so nice getting to know so many amazing women from throughout the country and beyond. I also learned tons from the various workshops on everything from breast reconstruction to de-cluttering your mind, etc. to dealing with the fear of recurrence.

One of the conference highlights was dancing the night away with this phenomenal group of women. I can't even explain how fabulous it felt to just let loose and have fun. One memory I know I won't ever forget from that night was dancing to Gloria Gaynor's "I Will Survive." What an empowering moment, singing along to those lyrics. It was like we were collectively telling off cancer. And boy did it feel good!

As a refresher, I've included some of the lyrics here.

Go on now go walk out the door
just turn around now
'cause you're not welcome anymore
weren't you the one who tried to hurt me with goodbye
Did you think I'd crumble
Did you think I'd lay down and die
Oh no, not I
I will survive
oh as long as i know how to love
I know I'll stay alive
I've got all my life to live
I've got all my love to give
and I'll survive
I will survive (hey hey)
I am also including a picture of a button I picked up at one of the booths at the conference. :)










And here is a picture of me after my first hair cut and color in a year.

Thank you to all of you for all of your love and support over the past year. I couldn't have done it with you!!

2013, here I come! :)

I think this is the happiest I have ever felt about starting a new year. :)

The year 2012 definitely goes in the books as one of my toughest years ever, both physically and emotionally.

When I was diagnosed with breast cancer on March 16th of last year, I had no idea what I was in for.  Honestly, if you had asked me then if I thought I was going to be able to handle all that I ended up having to endure, I would have said, "No way!"

Yes..I definitely went through some low points: being admitted to the hospital due to dangerously low white blood cell counts; excruciatingly painful mouth sores that seemed to last forever; and an unbelievably painful skin reaction to radiation.

But to my surprise - after a double mastectomy/oopherectomy (which, of course, put me into menapause), five months of chemotherapy, and 33 radiation treatments, and the above-mentioned low points - I can proudly announce that I survived. And I feel stronger for it.

Now, I am ready to take 2013 by storm. My skin is pretty much completely healed since my final radiation treatment on 12/21, and my energy level is improving all of the time. I have joined a gym and am so looking forward to getting back into a regular exercise routine. I am especially excited to start doing yoga again. I am also working on eating more natural, whole foods.

Since I am no longer having to drive to Seattle for daily radiation treatments, I am also starting to sign up for substitute teaching jobs left and right. I will be doing a long-term gig (8-10 weeks) in a 3rd grade classroom, starting in February. Yay! I am hopeful that my three years of subbing experience, including four long-term positions, will help me land a permanent position next school year.

On another note, I would love any positive thoughts/prayers sent my way as I undergo a CT scan on Tuesday. When I was first diagnosed, the radiologist saw a couple spots, one on my lung and the other on my spleen that they were minimally concerned about. My oncologist let me know early on that we would be doing this follow up CT scan after treatment to make sure that both of those areas are stable. She also assured me that she wasn't concerned, but just wants to make sure we dot all of our "i"s and cross all of our "t"s. Regardless, I am anxious to get the test done and have the results in hand.

I also started taking the estrogen-blocking drug this week, which I will continue to take every day for at least five years. And I will most likely get my reconstructive surgery done this summer. I have to say I am definitely looking forward to my new rack, and the cute bra shopping that will go with it :)

That's all for now. Happy New Year! Here's to a healthy 2013, everyone!